Work ends, love dies, existence comes to an end, because everything, sooner or later, ends definitively. Everything in this life is fleeting, and wanting to persist in making everything 'eternal' usually only creates a great frustration , difficult to overcome.
It makes sense and is emotionally healthy to be able to put an end point when things or aspects of life have come to an end. Forcing certain situations to survive, even if they are dying or dying, is like crying over spilled milk.
“… Nothing lasts: neither the starry night, nor the misfortunes, nor the wealth; all of this, suddenly, one day escaped '.
Nothing lasts forever, everything has an end
What happens with the major spheres of life (dreams, intellect, love, etc.) also happens with the minor spheres (material goods, beauty , fame), because these too have an end. Both big and small things sooner or later end, because everything in life 'is on loan' and has an expiration date.
Even material objects, once they have completed their cycle, are often a source of discouragement and even anger , unlike how they make us feel when they are new and just bought. This is perhaps due to the fact that we give them an eternal character. We even consider some products essential, as if they were an integral part of our own life or an extra organ in our body.
When we undergo plastic surgery to eliminate the signs of aging or do a lot of physical exercise, not thinking about our health, but for the sole purpose of maintaining a younger appearance, we fall into the fantasy of immutability and into the reality of impossible dreams, of unrealizable desires, of useless causes.
Because when we try to improve our physical appearance (which in some cases is possible), what we are actually doing is deteriorating our dignity and even our condition as human beings. A bit like becoming a product for sale, trade and the market that benefits others.
If there is something that can last longer, but is not eternal anyway, they are those intangible and profound realities . The footprints left by good or bad teachings or the memories we leave impressed in the lives of other people: what we write day after day in the book of our life and in the book of the life of others.
'Nobody knows what they have, until they lose it'
Many times we complain and deny even a person or a certain situation, until that person moves away from us, or dies, or until those situations, initially negative, become even worse. It is the comparison that gives us a real perspective on what we feel and which places the intensity of our suffering on a scale.
For example, when we constantly complain about our partner and then go back single, that's when we start to value every little feature of that person . Or when we go from living in a humble and warm house to a more beautiful place, but without that familiar atmosphere. Or even when we complain of a simple cold, as if it were a tragedy, and then we start suffering from a more serious illness and we realize that the cold was just nonsense.
Most of the time, when something begins, it is surrounded by an aura of newness and is filled with promises full of hope. However, as time goes by, we begin to see more i defects that the virtues, whether in objects, people or situations. So, when these realities end or disappear, the opposite happens: we focus more on the virtues and minimize the defects. Often this happens when there is nothing more to be done, when the end is approaching ...
The great courage to accept things as they are
When we are able to accept and assume the idea that everything that begins sooner or later ends, we avoid a large number of problems. It is not a question of covering oneself with discouragement, nor of falling into cynicism. It is about knowing that there is always a moment in which we will have to say goodbye , put a stop and deal with the pain.
Knowing how to cope with pain will allow us to heal the wounds left by a loss . Avoiding suffering or experiencing it the wrong way prevents the wound from closing and even ends up enlarging and infecting it. Because, as in the case of love, 'a nail does not drive another nail'. This means that, from one moment to the next, one person cannot replace another. Sooner or later, all the debts we don't pay have to be paid.
The loss and the pain they are always present in our life . Throughout our existence, we will have to say goodbye many times, to the people, situations or objects we love most. Everything is fleeting, nothing lasts forever, not even our own life. We all know this and, despite this, we continue to paint those fantasies of eternity.
Not knowing how to break away, not knowing how to say goodbye or decide when something has come to an end can be a serious problem. But it is also a problem to never get involved at all for fear of loss. Maybe, by learning to accept in a more natural way that everything ends, we will be able to enjoy more what surrounds us, the here and now , instead of regretting all that we have already lost.